Why I Love Rhode Island

1. The Speaker of the House says “lookit”:

http://www.nytimes.com/2013/04/21/business/curt-schilling-rhode-island-and-the-fall-of-38-studios.html?pagewanted=all&_r=1&

2. A helpful update notes that “Dawn Keibals” may not be a real name either:

http://deadspin.com/5956567/local-news-station-wishes-ijaz-fahted-and-dawn-keibals-a-happy-birthday

3. People will travel there from Tennessee in order to set off Roman candles in their motel room:

http://www.wrcbtv.com/story/12684032/tn-man-charged-in-ri-with-motel-fireworks

4.  Hell is directly beneath a natatorium in North Providence:

http://www.jincywillett.com/journal/2010/10/27/hell/

5. Roger Williams

http://www.slate.com/articles/life/history/2012/12/the_roger_williams_code_how_a_team_of_scholars_discovered_the_theologian.html

6. The Young Adults.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-YrzRHMTERg

 

 

OLD AI SUGGESTED CORRECTIONS

…for some of my previous novels, all of which were ignored.

 

abrupted  abducted

absurder   asunder

Baba Yaga     Baba Gaga

blurbed   blared, burbled

Bobisode     Boise

Bombeck  buyback, bombast, blowback, comeback

Bunschaft     bun’s haft

bursty   busty

Carrollian  Carolina, Carroll Ian

clacketing   closeting

Cloacina   cocaine

corvines   corniness

crapload     cartload, carload

cretinous     creationist, resinous

Croatoan  Croatian

Crumpackers  crump Ackers

decomp     decamp

deus  dues

dictabelts  disablers

farty     fatty, party, arty

Fedexed   fidgeted

fetich   fetch

Fugard   sugared

glancingly   clankingly

Godot  godbout, goody, goo, goof

gonna   gonad

googling  go ogling, goodling, gouging, gosling

Grabow  gabo, gabon, grabbed, Gabor, grebe, garbed

groped   grouped

guilting  quilting, gulping

happy-slappy  happy-sloppy, happy-sappy, happy-soapy

has-beens  has-beans, has-bees, has-Benz

insectile     invective, infertile

John Dos Passos  john dos pesos, john dos lassos

Kronkheit conceit, crunchiest, crunchier

Lex   lox

lit-fic  lit-fix, lit-fib

mammo  mamma, mambo, memo, ammo, mammy

mashup   mishap

medevaced medicated, medi aced, bedeviled

memetic     mimetic, emetic, meme tic

midwater     midwinter

mojitos  monitors, bonitos

moqueca  moonquake, mosques, toques

Mount Pelee  Mount Peewee

mousing moussing, housing, lousing

neuronically   neurotically

neuroticized eroticized

ong-ong-ong  one-on-one

pantload  planeload

p.o.v.     p.m.

pervy   purvey, nervy, privy

prosecco   prospector

Puckish peckish

redtail     retail

redux  redub, redo, redbud, radio

rehaul     Renault

retitled  rattled

Roofy     roomy, goofy

Ruggles  bugles, wriggles, drugless

sithen     zither

slice-o-matics  slice-o-metrics, slice-o-mates

ta-da  ta-dab, ta-dad, ta-dap, ta-do

tautog     tutu, tattoo, tauter, tujtor, auto

Tex-Mex     Tex-Maxi

thuggees   thuggish

tiparillos  tomatillos

unamused     amused, unmasked

uncelebration acceleration

unchastened  unchaste Ned

uncurtained  uncontained

unlured  uncured, unloosed, unladed

unmagical   numerical, unmusical

untasted     untoasted, unstated

viatical   piratical

voguing     gouging, pogoing, rouging

walkies   willies, walkups, wackiest, alkies

whitecoats     whiteouts, whitecaps

 

Horrifying Words

Probably not everybody suffers from Specific Word Phobia (SWP)   (if anybody can come up with a pseudoclinical name for this, please do), but I’m guessing I’m not the only one, so I’m starting a new list.

What I’m looking for are words that horrify–not because of what they mean (rape, Akin,   etc.) but just because of the way they look, lolling or crouching there on the page, the way they sound, insinuating in the ear.   The ugly, icky word is physically repulsive.   One is literally taken aback.   One blinks, scowls; one’s mouth waters in an unpleasant way.   One simply hates the word.   One does not know why, nor does one care.

I’d be stunned if any universal truths emerge from this project.   I have no purpose here beyond curiosity.   I can’t be the only one with SWP.   Or am I?

I’ll go first.     Remember, the meaning of the word can be innocuous.   Appearance is all.   And just to clarify:   These are words you hate to use and when forced to, you find the experience unpleasant.   You probably grimace.

 

besom

From Laura Preble:

veiny

From the Magic Hermit:

velour

punctilious

ocular

moor

From Lynn Heilman:

smarmy

From Lisa Roche:

pus

From John Kornhauser:

louche

From Billy Frolick:

moist

beverage

From Karen Worley:

sanguine

scrotum

From Kathy Kulpa:

cremains*

smegma

From Anne Baker:

necropsy

From Elizabeth Carrera:

obese

 

*I share “cremains.”   It’s like “clamato.”   Using it, one feels degraded.

Late-Breaking Sausage Attack Stories from Southeastern New England

Holbrook man used sausage links as weapon

BROCKTON–

A Holbrook man was charged after police said he attacked and robbed a Brockton man using stolen sausage links and a wrench at West Street and Forest Avenue Sunday morning.

The victim told police he was riding his bike about 8 a.m. Sunday when Michael A. Baker, whom he does not know, came up to him “and started swinging sausage links at him,” Lt. David Dickinson said Sunday.

“He said he was trying to hit him with that. The victim had no idea why,” Dickinson said.

Baker then threw stolen meat, bread and cheese he was carrying into a nearby barrel “and began smashing the victim with a wrench,” Dickinson said.

The victim suffered multiple lacerations in the attack, and was taken by ambulance to a local hospital, Dickinson said. His condition was not known on Sunday.

The victim told police Baker stole a silver chain, ring and silver bike from him.

A jogger found the victim yelling for help and saw Baker take off with the victim’s bike, Dickinson said.

Officers later found Baker heading east on Neubert Street on a bike, and arrested him.

“The officer could see a wrench in his left pocket. The officer noticed red stains appearing to be blood on (Baker’s) clothing and hands,” Dickinson said.

Officers charged Baker, 22, of 176 Longmeadow Drive, Apt. 204, Holbrook, with assault and battery with a dangerous weapon, a wrench; armed robbery; disturbing the peace; disorderly conduct; and receiving stolen property under $250.

Officers later reported a break and entry into a sausage stand at the Brockton Fairgrounds.

“They saw the same cuts of meat and cheese and bread in the fairgrounds sausage stand. It had been pried open,” Dickinson said.

Baker was scheduled to be arraigned in Brockton District Court today.

The BCI unit of the Plymouth County Sheriff’s Department also responded to take photographs.

Read more:  http://www.enterprisenews.com/topstories/x1222856805/Brockton-police-Holbrook-man-charged-in-attack-using-sausage-links-and-wrench#ixzz1y9lMfEtW

What Music Will Waft Through Boomer Nursing Homes?

A new game.

Uber-boomers–the very brightest twinkles in the eye of World War II–are beginning to retire, collect SS as well as Actual Health Benefits (as opposed to spending so much   money on private health insurance that you can’t afford doctor visits), and, well, die.   This process won’t be pretty and, for most of us, it won’t be quick, and millions of us will (despite our firm belief that of course we’ll jump off a bridge first) end up in nursing   homes.     These places will be called something else, but they’ll be nursing homes, and regardless of changes in medical technology there will be certain constants.   The most haunting of these is, to me, the music we are going to have no choice in hearing.

It won’t be Stephen Foster songs. It won’t be Glenn Miller.   It will be…what?   What is your worst-case most-often-played future nursing home music?

I’ll go first.

“Hotel California.”   I’m sure of this.

You may also nominate a best-case.   “Gimme Shelter” would be lovely.

Go to it.

Edit That Copy!

A new list.   These have to be current and from cited sources.   I’ll start.

Couple Killed in Crash ‘Did What They Loved’

(Am I alone in thinking this a botched headline?   I’m guessing that the couple didn’t love dying in a crash…)

 

“The entire show was basically a puzzle which led back to Red John, who was trying to track down former CBI head  Madeleine Hightower, who was on the lamb after being falsely accused of murdering a suspect in CBI custody.”

http://www.wral.com/entertainment/blogpost/9639299/

 

“Coach Hugh McCutcheon’s father was stabbed to death at a popular Chinese tourist site a day before opening ceremony and missed the team’s first three matches before leading them to the title.”

(Online Miami Herald, 8/4/2012)